Letter #6

My sweet, sweet boy,

Day one of the procedure is over. Your heart has stopped beating and you can no longer kick or flip around in mommy’s tummy. It’s a strange feeling but I know it is for the best.

They gave mommy a deep sedative that made her very sleepy but still responsive. From what I kind of remember the doctor said you held really still for him to give you the medication to stop your heart beat. I barely felt a thing besides a small pinch here and there. But you did amazing, and so did daddy. He was right by mommy’s side the whole time and only left when the doctors made him; he is also taking amazing care of me right now. Mommy was not allowed to eat all morning and did not get out of the doctors until about 3pm in the afternoon, so her blood sugar was really low. Daddy took me to Whataburger and while he was ordering our food he said that I just started swaying back and forth and fell down on my knees. I woke up and was wondering why my knees hurt! He just laughed and said that I passed out and he had to pick me and carry me. 

I have to induce labor tomorrow so we can finish the procedure. The nurse said that tomorrow is going to be the worst part of all. That I have to put pills in my mouth and just let them sit. And that they cause nausea, diarrhea, dry mouth, etc. etc. etc. basically everything to make it worse. I was thinking about that before the procedure and wanted to get up and run for the hills. But daddy made me feel better and reminded me that we were making the right choice for our baby boy. All the doctors say that you are so cute, and all I can do is agree with them.

I miss you already and love you so much. Mommy and daddy wish we could meet you but god has another plan for us. 

We love you baby boy.

XOXO,

Mommy and Daddy